2021 / February

Can’t hold it back anymore.

Let it Go by Idina Menzel

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

I think the Disney film Frozen probably has one of the defining soundtracks of a generation. But perhaps it’s just that I’ve heard it so many times I can even speak the parts of the reindeer! Probably it’s most famous track, Let it Go by Idina Menzel, is one that I think really speaks about our wellbeing.

The songs opening verse contains an unexpectedly COVID appropriate lyric:

A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I’m the queen.

I know there are many who have been feeling like that in recent times. Yet, it’s not isolation, but the challenge of socialisation which I want to think about this week. For all of us there are times when the other part of the opening verse will seem all too familiar:

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside. Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I tried!

Yes, isolation might be horrid, but let’s being honest, sometimes all of us get annoyed by other people. Often, in these situations we feel like we can’t keep our frustrations in. And often there is good reason not to keep them in. The song declares:

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see. Be the good girl you always have to be. Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.

We fear how others might perceive us if we are honest. Yet this is not a great strategy. Normally when we do this we will quickly recognise how that build up of frustration usually turns out:

Well, now they know!

See, the things about us pretending to be perfect, or not to be bothered when really, we are, is that the brewing storm within usually finds its way out anyway, but just with less thoughtfulness. The solution, I think is three-fold; communication, perspective and letting go.

My soul is spiralling in frozen fractals all around and one thought crystallizes like an icy blast.

When we feel frustrated it is vital to communicate our feelings with others. We can’t expect people to know how we feel without telling them. The art though is to do it with planning and thought rather than releasing an icy blast. And part of that planning is taking the time to see the issue in perspective:

It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small. And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all!

Whilst our emotional self might react, we need to allow it to do what it does and then engage our rational self to plan what we want to say. But then there is one final act:

Let it go, let it go. Can’t hold it back anymore.

Once we have communicated in a planned and considered way what we think the issue is, we need to let it go.

Need some help gaining perspective and being able to let go? Why not consider booking an appointment with the author, Dr Dave Wood?

Let It Go is taken from the Frozen – Original Motion Picture Soundtrack.

Author

hello@realigncoaching.co.uk
Providing innovative, high quality community life coach training and professional, social skills and wellbeing workshops at an affordable cost. Dave is a former Senior Probation Officer, now founder and director of Metanoeo CIC, Realign Coaching and Theolotweet Academy. He also lectures in Psychosocial Analysis and Community Wellbeing and is a community life coach and trainer. Dave holds a BA in Bible and Theology, BA(Hons) in Community Justice, MA in Criminal Justice and PhD in Theology. He is a member of the Association for Coaching, a Fellow of the School for Social Entrepreneurs, a Fellow of the Higher Education Academy and also a community member of Forum Housing Association.

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