One Fing ‘n’ Anuvver by Chas’n’Dave
So, an update on my DIY project, our buy to let property: every time I start one job it seems to lead to the discovery of another job which needs to be done first. In the words of Chas’n’Dave:
You know ‘ow it is, wot wiv one fing ‘n’ anuvver.
For example, we got a new boiler fitted only to discover that now we could switch the central heating on the system was leaking water. So, I started tracing the leaks only to discover that most of them were pipes that were left disconnected, but then boxed and tiled over. I then take off the tiles and plasterboard only to discover there is no way of shutting the water off as there is no stop cock. You get the picture. In situations like this it is so tempting to just say:
I’ve ‘ad a bleedin’ nuff of it wiv one fing ‘n’ anuvver.
Now, don’t get me wrong, there are certainly times when you stop and think, is this worth it; what am I going to find next, even if only for a fleeting moment. But the key is about recovery. Having the thought is natural, but it is what you do next which determines your success.
For me, the best solution is always to acknowledge the feeling and then pause to explore its validity. The thought will likely be triggered by a realistic concern, but how likely is it and can it be addressed? Using our house example, yes, it is likely that we will find more things wrong, but then finding them now means they won’t pop up unexpectedly later. Yes, this does mean the job is going to take longer, but does it need to be done so quickly anyway. You can see the point, for every point there is usually a counter point which we need to remind ourselves of.
So, when feeling overwhelmed, the key thing isn’t the feeling, but our response to the feeling. It doesn’t mean we have to like what’s going on, or pretend it’s all fine, but that we simply have to find the right narrative to help us get back up and get back on.
PS. If you do know anyone who is looking to rent a house soon, this one really should have no unfound problems!
Need some help getting up when things are getting you down? Why not consider booking an appointment with the author, Dr Dave Wood?